What Video Games Taught Me About Morality
By Miodrag Kovačević | December 10, 2011 | Features | No comments | Share
As a gamer, I rarely leave my home, and thus rarely come across situations where my own views and beliefs are tested. My understanding of right and wrong boils down to what I’ve learned from video game storytelling, meaning that if I ever encounter a situation where I have to decide between saving or eating a celestial jackalope, I will be able to make the right decision.
Saving the World Is an Excuse to Be a Bastard
Learned from: The Legend of Zelda, plenty of other games.
Am I given the task to save a town, country or world from oblivion? Well, I obviously can’t do it in my 
current state, so I’ll need some help. What is that, fair peasant? You decline to offer me tribute, despite me risking my life so you may live to see your cattle grow into fine liverwurst? I shall help myself then to the useful trinkets and effects of your pots, chests and various drawers. Will my conscience give me rest? Of course it will! For I am the hero, and taking whatever I need to save you all is perfectly reasonable and acceptable.
Lesson: all the homeless need to do to become rich is embark on a quest to save the world.
A Noble Cause Justifies Inflicting Harm and Destruction
Learned from: almost every game in existence.
War is hell. Sometimes you have to do things that may haunt you for the rest of your days. Saving 
princesses is hell, too. Often, you’ll have to kill turtles and other sentient creatures. When you think about it, there are very few heroes who haven’t taken at least one life in their never-ending journey. Those who did manage to follow the vow of peace had to at least resort to destruction of inanimate objects. But this is alright! You see, if a living being is different enough from common races, or at least the good ones, then its life is simply worth less. Nobody will mind, and everyone will hail you a hero if you hunt down the whole population of sentient slimes.
Lesson: good means destroying that which you do not tolerate.
Sentient Creatures Come in Good, Bad and Don’t Care Varieties
Learned from: most games with a morality or karma system.
There are three types of people in this world. Those who love, those who hate and those who don’t give a 
damn. It’s really easy to categorize all sentient beings and lump them into one of these three categories. You see, a person cannot be a complex combination of various traits, vices and virtues. No, that’s stupid. If an unknown race is about to execute a bunny, you are obliged to walk away, help the execution or save the bunny. What’s that? You want to know the reasons for executing the bunny? What the traditions of the unknown race is? Whether the bunny committed a crime? You want an informed opinion? That doesn’t make any sense. Now, choose between the blue, red and grey options available.
Lesson: morality is as simple as choosing the coke size in McDonald’s.
Evil Punches, Good Hugs
Learned from: BioWare games for most part.
Not all decisions require thought. Some require you to react at a moment’s notice. Quick! Someone is 
annoying you and you’re evil! Punch them. There, now you’ve proven how bad you are. What, scheming? Plotting against a person you dislike to utterly ruin their life forever? Why would you do that? Wait! Someone you barely met is about to cry! Are you good? For the love of all that is holy, hug them! In addition to this, is there someone who is useful to you who needs a hug because it will improve your own performance in the long run? But you’re evil? Sorry, you can’t help them. If you wanted to deceive someone that you cared, but you were only interested in personal gain, you can’t do that. You cannot fake being sincere. That’s like… an oxymoron or something.
Lesson: moral decisions are instantaneous and obvious.
Morality is Color-Coded
Learned from: oh god, all the games.
Black is evil or anti-hero, in which case it is ironically evil. White is good or over-zealous, in which 
case it is ironically good. Red with white is chaotic good, red with black is chaotic evil. White and yellow is divinely nice, while black and yellow means you are a wasp. But purple? Purple is only good on its own, because it is unsalvageable. When you combine it with black, though, it’s over. It is the ultimate evil of all evils. Unless it is red, black and purple. Then it is all over. It is an entity that feeds on hopes and dreams, corrupts those it touches, ruins birthday parties by tripping the person carrying the cake and ends all love in the world. It is so evil, that even regular evil guys avoid it. It is so evil, that it makes gamers play Mortal Kombat: Special Forces.
Lesson: colors will either help you identify the alignment of a person, or whether they’re a hipster.
